email for the women!:)

i just set up the women's group e-mail addresses. i havnt really been able to decide what to give them that would be practical and lasting so i decided to get them e-mail accounts on gmail which i just made for all of them, and im going to buy each one of them a 12 hour card to a local internet cafe (theres only 8 women in the group, actually 7 women and 1 man, so one for each). And i am going to get them Primary level 3 English books, as i'm almost done teaching them Primary 2, but ive been photocopying out of the p2 book so they dont have their own. So they will each have an email account, a primary 3 book for whoever teaches them next, a new blank notebook of lined paper, some pens, and 12 hours internet at an internet cafe. i might offer to sponsor some of their kids also i juts need to find out what the needs are at the moment.

its august 22 today so that's seventeen days til i'm on a plane back home! and only nine til zanzibar (which is where im spending my last week here in africa). im so excited to come home.

i think ive grown a lot more cynical about progress in africa since i came here to tanzania.... i cant help it. i get irritated when nonprofits come here and hand out toys or give kids crayons when those kids cant pay their school fees which i think is the primary concern. i also cant stand the amount of people, particularly men here, in the community who just stand around all day, no matter what day of the week it is, doing nothing. its this phrase in swahili, "pole pole" which is very much part of the culture and attitude here, it means "slowly slowly". everything is done at a pace so slow that progress seems impossible. and then those same guys are raising their kids to sit there and shout "mzungu give me money!" when we walk by. i wish i could say to the men that just sit there, in swahili, "its tuesday morning go out and work or sell, do something dont just sit there and ask me for money!!!!!!!!!!!" i just think in order for the burden of poverty to be alleviated, the attitude and desire for it has to start here. i saw a picture of madonna in some magazine last week wearing a t-shirt that had an image of africa and a peace sign, and it said it was for some nonprofit aiming to end poverty in africa by 2020. I cant help but laugh at that. end poverty in thirteen years when pole pole is the attitude here and the west comes out and gives crayons and takes pictures before paying for the kid's education????? i'm sorry i sound so cynical but aiming to "end poverty" and put a date on it is the most ludicrous goal ive ever heard. Its like in What About Bob. Babysteps. First things first, there needs to be an attitude makeover here. The bummer is, there are definately people here who desire something more for themselves and their country and are willing to work for it, but just cant make it happen, because for every one of them, there are 100 people with the lazy "pole pole" and "mzungu give me money" attitude. thats the biggest crime, is that committed by the lazy people against the few who want something more. why cant everyone just work together !!!!!!!!!!

if you havent been able to tell in the blogs, i have not grown as emotionally attached to my project in tanzania as in uganda. i felt the people i met in my village in uganda wanted education and growth, and never stood there and asked us to throw money at them, unless it was to pay school fees. i think this attitude of "mzungu give me money" here in moshi and in the major african cities stems from the habit the West had of "throwing money at the African problem" and just giving so much aid and NEVER accounting for where it dropped or ended up. it made africans see the West as having so much money that they could just throw it at african countries without noticing or caring whether it was the dictator that got all the money and all the people. the fact that every white person here seems to be working under the auspices of some organization that just hands out money freely doesnt do much to change the african's view. maybe their view that we should just hand them money has originated for a very legitamite reason. im cynical because i cant see how it can be undone at this point. hahahaha especially not in 13 years.

the aid organizations that seem to be doing right are generally the medical ones, red cross, doctors without borders, direct relief, and other organizations aiming to alleviate the disease burden here and educate on sanitation. i have nothing but praise for most of those organizations. also, ive been VERY impressed by one particular loosely religious organization, which i was surprised by: World Vision. in my tiny remote vilage of nyakasiru in uganda, World Vision had built their school and outfitted it with everything from chairs to chalkboards, had built their village's clean water supply, and set up the entire sanitary water system that served the village and those around it. I was extremely impressed by that work and i would definately consider donating to them after what i'd seen.

however, there is a lot of bureaucracy in world vision and many of these behemouth nonprofits on the ground. god only knows how much of your dollar will end up in that building. especially with the level of corruption at the local level here.

but bottom line, i think its the attitude thats the problem. this whole "pole pole" thing sounds nice to us who live lives that are a bit too fast paced, but it will get them nowhere, realistically. theyve got to work for more than 4 hours a day. this is by no means a blanket statement, because i know sooo many here who work harder than anyone at home. aka warren in uganda who e-mailed you dad, that guy works like 5 jobs that each are very noble, and supports 9 children, none of which are his. Amazing when you meet people like that. also, Rahima, the teacher at a nearby nursery school next to my women's group here, is amazing. she teaches 40 kids and only 3 of them pay school fees, and her pay is from the school fees. she can barely even afford rent at her school (which is really cheap) but she does it all out of a labor of love. shes the happiest woman you'll ever meet. and then i found out that rahima's mother was raped and she was the product of it, and she was rejected her whole life by her mother and raised by a grandmother and sexually abused by an uncle. shes a champion and most people are champions here in some way, because of the prevalence of disease and desperation from poverty. so though i'm cynical, those few characters will keep me hopeful. even the guys that nag me (and annoy the heck out of me) on the street to pay an arm and a leg for some cheap piece of tourist jewelry they're selling, they keep me hopeful too. because at least they too are trying to make a buck instead of sitting around in the street.

-suz